Why Being a Beginner is Harder Than Anyone Tells You (And What Actually Helps)

There’s something nobody really warns you about when you decide to learn something new as an adult.

It’s uncomfortable. Really uncomfortable!

Not just the “oh, this is tricky” kind of uncomfortable. I mean the kind where you sit down with a sketchbook, pick up a pencil, and feel a rush of something that’s part excitement, part dread, and part a very loud voice saying: “who do you think you are?”

Sound familiar?

I think one of the reasons so many adults struggle to get started with drawing and painting — or start and then quietly give up without mentioning it to anyone — is that we’ve forgotten what it actually feels like to be a genuine beginner. We’ve spent years getting good at things. We know how to navigate our jobs, our homes, our routines. And then we pick up a pencil and suddenly we’re six years old again — except this time we care a lot more about what it looks like!

I was reading a really interesting article recently about how to be a better beginner — the psychology behind learning something new — and it stopped me in my tracks because so much of what it described, I’ve seen play out in my art groups over and over again. And honestly? In my own practice too.

So let me share some of the things that stood out to me, and why I think they matter so much for anyone wanting to start drawing or painting.

Effective skill-building usually feels clumsy

Here’s one that I think is really important: when you’re genuinely learning something, it’s supposed to feel awkward.

We live in a world of polished tutorials and beautiful sketchbook videos, and it’s very easy to watch someone else draw with confidence and think: “it should feel like that.” Flowing. Easy. Natural.

But that’s not what learning actually looks like from the inside. Real learning feels clunky. Your hand doesn’t do what your brain tells it to. Lines go the wrong way. Proportions are off. You rub out the same thing four times.

That’s not failure. That’s exactly what’s supposed to be happening.

The article makes the point that we often confuse following along with actually understanding — and I think this is so true for art. Copying a tutorial step by step can feel great in the moment, but it’s the messy, independent attempts that actually build the skill. The mistakes are the lesson.

Adults are actually brilliant learners — just differently

There’s a really common belief that children pick things up more easily than adults. And in some ways, yes — children learn language and movement through sheer immersive repetition in a way that’s hard to replicate.

But here’s what adults have that children don’t: the ability to see the bigger picture. To make connections between new skills and things we already know. To understand why something works, not just that it does.

In my experience, adult learners bring so much to an art session — curiosity, life experience, an eye for the world that a child simply hasn’t developed yet. The challenge isn’t ability. It’s unlearning the idea that you’re too old, too rusty, or too far behind to bother starting.

You’re not. I promise.

The goal isn’t to get it right. It’s to get it wrong — usefully.

This one took me a while to really internalise, and I still have to remind myself of it!

We’re so wired to want to produce something good — something we’d be happy to show someone — that we put enormous pressure on every mark we make. And that pressure? It’s the thing that makes us freeze.

The research on skill-building is pretty clear: mistakes aren’t just inevitable, they’re necessary. The brain actually learns more from correcting an error than from getting something right first time. So every wonky circle, every proportion that’s slightly off, every drawing that ends up in the bin — it’s all doing something.

And don’t be embarrassed about the mistake and throw it away. Keep it as a reminder of the progress you’ve made! If you have no references, how will you know how far you’ve come?

Small and consistent beats big and occasional. Every time.

If I had to pick just one practical thing from everything I’ve read and experienced, it’s this:

We tend to think learning requires big blocks of time. A proper session. A real commitment. And because life rarely hands us a free Saturday afternoon, we put it off until conditions are perfect — which, as we both know, they never are!

But short, regular practice is genuinely more effective than longer, infrequent sessions. Your brain consolidates learning during rest — so a little bit today, a little bit tomorrow, is actually more powerful than a three-hour session once a fortnight.

Ten minutes counts. I mean that. I am always encouraging short bursts when I film Instagram posts – the “Got 5 mins? Do this…” type thing is exactly the way forward!

You need the right starting point

Here’s the thing that ties all of this together, and it’s something I feel really strongly about.

Most beginner art resources throw you in at the deep end. They assume you already know how to hold a pencil with confidence, how to look at a subject and translate it onto paper, how to silence the inner critic long enough to make a mark.

But those are skills too. And they’re the ones most people skip.

Getting the foundations right — in the right order, without overwhelm — changes everything. It’s the difference between someone who tries drawing once and gives up, and someone who quietly builds a creative habit that stays with them.

This is genuinely why I created my free course KickstART. Not to teach you to draw a perfect portrait or paint a landscape — but to give you the foundations that make all of that possible later. Five days, ten minutes a day, with the building blocks that most beginners never get.

If you’ve been thinking about starting — or restarting — this is the place to begin. It’s free, it’s gentle, and it meets you exactly where you are.

Because here’s the truth about being a beginner: it’s supposed to feel hard. But it doesn’t have to feel lonely or directionless. And with the right start, it can feel like the best thing you’ve done for yourself in a long time.

Have you had a moment recently where you’ve wanted to start something and talked yourself out of it? I’d love to hear about it in the comments — you’re probably not alone!

Debbie x